To The Parents Of The Child Who Should Be Starting Kindergarten — They Can Join My Classroom

Summer is winding down and I’m gearing up for a new school year. Yesterday, I sat down to finish my mailing for my new Kindergarten students. I worked my way through the list, personalizing each letter with my student’s name (I feel like it adds a little extra love when you put pen to paper … More To The Parents Of The Child Who Should Be Starting Kindergarten — They Can Join My Classroom

I Know That My Baby Died, So Stop Pretending It’s A Secret

  I’m the lady with the dead baby. It’s okay, I’m allowed to be so blunt because it’s my truth.  I am the lady whose baby died. One day my baby was living and the next day she died.  That is what happened.  It doesn’t offend me if you acknowledge this. It offends me when … More I Know That My Baby Died, So Stop Pretending It’s A Secret

Using Therapy To Heal After Pregnancy And Infant Loss

There’s an assumption that people go to therapy to fix what’s broken.  I believe this is a reason why people regard therapy with such hesitation.  It’s painful to face your fragmented life and it can be even more painful to pick up the pieces. If you’re a bereaved parent, you might not see the point … More Using Therapy To Heal After Pregnancy And Infant Loss

When Your Baby Dies And You Are Left Watching Another Live The Life You Lost

My daughter, Frances, has a favorite game that we play.  It’s called ‘baby in the mirror’ and it consists of her father or I holding her up so she can watch ‘the baby in the mirror.’ She is fascinated by her reflection and she seems both elated and unsure of what her mirror baby might … More When Your Baby Dies And You Are Left Watching Another Live The Life You Lost

All That Remains–Why I Haven’t Laid My Daughter To Rest

All that remains of my daughter, Dorothy, rests on my desk.  Nestled in between a stack of journals and my pencil cup of felt tip pens, there is a tiny ceramic urn adorned with a floral pattern in purple and ivory.  I wish I could give a poignant reason for her being there. But, the … More All That Remains–Why I Haven’t Laid My Daughter To Rest

I Am “Moving On” After The Death Of My Child — And I Am Taking Her With Me

I’m not sure who was the first to say it, but after my daughter, Dorothy, died there were many who assured me that I would move on.  They phrased it like a promise — a reassurance that one day soon I would set down my grief and return to a life of happiness.  In my … More I Am “Moving On” After The Death Of My Child — And I Am Taking Her With Me

I Would Rather Have A Lifetime: Why Pregnancy And Infant Loss Awareness Month Will Never Be Enough

October is here. In my world, this means crisp leaves and chunky sweaters and it also means participating in Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month.  The month of October is widely recognized as a time to honor those families who know the experience of losing a baby. It might sound depressing to participate in a … More I Would Rather Have A Lifetime: Why Pregnancy And Infant Loss Awareness Month Will Never Be Enough

The One Thing I Will Never Say To My Friends With No Living Children

To those friends I know who have no living children, I want to tell you that I love you.  I want to tell you that I think you are courageous and gracious and strong.  There are so many words that spill from my heart when I witness your pain and hear your story.  But, there … More The One Thing I Will Never Say To My Friends With No Living Children